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>Do you want to be Forgiven or Excused?

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I recently read a sermon by C.S. Lewis called “On Forgiveness” (From the Weight of Glory published by HarperCollins).  I thought I would share some of the brilliant insights from Lewis:

Forgive Everyone/Everything or you will not be Forgiven Anything
“We believe (as Christians) that God forgives us our sins; but also that He will not do so unless we forgive other people their sins against us.  There is no doubt about the second part of this statement.  It is in the Lord’s Prayer; it was emphatically stated by our Lord.  If you don’t forgive you will not be forgiven.  No part of His teaching is clearer, and there are no exceptions to it.  He doesn’t say that we are to forgive other people’s sins provided they are not too frightful, or provided there are no extenuating circumstances, or anything of that sort.  We are to forgive them all, however spiteful, however mean, however often they are repeated.  If we don’t, we shall be forgiven none of our own.”

Forgiven or Excused?
“I find that when I think I am asking God to forgive me I am often in reality (unless I watch myself very carefully) asking Him to do something quite different.  I am asking Him not to forgive me but to excuse me.  But there is all the difference in the world between forgiving and excusing.  Forgiveness says “Yes, you have done this thing, but I accept your apology; I will never hold it against you and everything between us two will be exactly as it was before.”  But excusing says “I see that you couldn’t help it or didn’t mean it; you weren’t really to blame.”  If one was not really to blame then there is nothing to forgive.  In that sense forgiveness and excusing are almost opposites.”

Please Forgive Me but Understand …
“…the trouble us that what we call ‘asking God’s forgiveness’ very often really consists in asking God to accept our excuses.  What leads us into this mistake is the fact that there usually is some amount of excuse, some ‘extenuating circumstances.’  We are sp very anxious to point these out to God (and to ourselves) that we are apt to forget the really important thing; that is, the bit left over, the bit which the excuses don’t cover, the bit which is inexcusable but not, thank God, unforgivable.  And if we forget this, we shall go away imagining that we have repented and been forgiven when all that has really happened is that we have satisfied ourselves with our own excuses.  They may be very bad excuses; we are all too easily satisfied about ourselves.”

No Excuses
“When you go to a doctor you show him the bit of you that is wrong-say, a broken arm.  It would be a mere waste of time to keep on explaining that your leg and eyes and throat are all right.  You may be mistaken in thinking so, and anyway, if they are really all right, the doctor will know that.”

He Forgives!!
“A great deal of our anxiety to make excuses comes from not really believing in it (forgiveness), from thinking that God will not take us to Himself again unless He is satisfied that some sort of case can be made out in our favor.  But that would not be forgiveness at all.”

For more on forgiving others, pick up the book here: http://www.amazon.com/Weight-Glory-C-S-Lewis/dp/0060653205/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1270923180&sr=1-1

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Standing on the Rock

Injured Texas quarterback Colt McCoy after watching his team lose the national championship

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>Good Year for the Westchester Men’s Ministry

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The WMM had a good year in 2009. We hope to have a breakout year in 2010.

First a look back, in 2009 we…

  • had over 10 events including a golf event, hiking, multiple breakfasts and our Christmas dinner.
  • had our first breakfast with Grace Fellowship.
  • had multiple new people join our small groups or attend one of our events.
  • setup a blog, a Facebook group and a Twitter account. We have over 200 followers on Twitter and appear on 6 lists.
  • had nearly 2 dozen men for our Christmas dinner, our largest group yet, including a few new people.
  • just got started!

In 2010, we have big goals!

  1. We feel God is calling us to prepare for the harvest — so we plan to do leadership training
  2. We also feel God wants us to “do” his Word as a group — so we will be coordinating more outreach events.
  3. We will have our first retreat in the early Spring of 2010 (watch for more details)!!
  4. I believe we will have a small group of committed people step up in 2010 that will allow WMM to fulfill the role God intends for it. This may include 501c(3) status and a broader reach in Westchester county.
  5. The spirit of the Westchester Men’s Ministry is to be community based and support multiple churches. So my optimistic goal is to bring leaders from many churches together in 2010 to share our vision to bring hope to the hopeless and strengthen each other!
There are many people to thank for their support in 2009 including Dick Weidenheft, George Holladay, Peter Corfield and Fred Seiler among many others. Thank you guys!
We hope you have a very happy new year. Please pray that God will lead us and protect us because we can do all things through Him who strengthens us and conversely we can do nothing in our own power.
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>Small Group Opportunities

> Last week, we kicked off the year with breakfast. Kevin Gillen spoke to us about being an example in our homes. This is our first and in many ways our primary missionary field. So it was a very appropriate way to kick off our year.


Two small groups are now available for you to join to continue the conversation. These groups provide a safe environment to share, be encouraged and to grow together in Christ. I hope you will take advantage of them.


Thursday Evening at 7pm

Rob Rosati and Marc Greenblum (leaders)

22 Baltic Place, Apt. 3P

Croton-on-Hudson, NY 10520

Every other Saturday Morning at 7:30am

(Yea, you miss a little sleep but you won’t miss any Saturday family events.)

Started Today. Will meet Oct 17th and 31st. November 7th and 21st; December 5th and 19th.

19 Saddle Ridge Road (right off of route 133 near Millwood)

Ossining, NY 10562

914-373-4855

Don’t wait until the next monthly breakfast to be blessed!

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>Come Hiking With Us

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We’re going to take a hike next Saturday, the 13th. Why not join us! We’re going to meet at our house at 19 Saddle Ridge Road in Ossining at 7:30am and head out shortly afterwards to a local trail.

We would love to have you join us. Please stop by and bring a friend. Hope to see you Saturday!
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The Love Dare

    Last month, a number of us saw the movie Fireproof. (http://thelovedarebook.com/fireproof-movie.html)  Some of us picked up the book and committed to taking the dare.  Frankly, I’ve found it hard to find time even though it take only a few minutes.  I’m not sure why, but in speaking to a few other people I’ve found that I’m not alone.

    When I have taken the challenge and responded to the leadings in the book, Carolyn has noticed and has appreciated my efforts.  Therefore I’m going to try harder because I feel that much like praying, the devil maybe trying to keep me from something that will strengthen my marriage and my faith.
    I encourage you too, to pick up the book if you haven’t.  I’m sure we would all admit that no matter how long we’ve been married, our marriage is not perfect.  The question is, are you comfortable with that?   Or are you willing to push yourself to be a better husband?
    We are looking for a few people to share their experiences, either anonymously or preferrable not.  Please e-mail me at NYMensMinistry@yahoo.com.  Hope you have a great Memorial Day weekend!
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Dick Wiedenheft
Jan 31, 2009 Men’s Breakfast @ Community Bible Church

“An investment that pays”

Matthew 25:14-30

(Some of the insights here are thanks to a talk I heard by Michael Breen recently at a 3d ministries training event – http://www.3dministries.org/)

(Image courtesy of http://www.netminsitry.com/)

I recently learned a new insight on this well-known parable which really opened it up.

Just a few observations about the story. Then a few questions for us to discuss. Then draw some practical conclusions.

Observations.
1. This master was very rich.
1 talent = 10-30 years wages. Between $1/2 million and 3 million.

2. This master was trusting and generous.

The fact that God includes us in his business of advancing his kingdom at all is a huge honor and responsibility.

And everything we receive is by God’s grace.

Granted the servants received money according to their abilities, but it was still God’s choosing to give it to them.

3. Nothing we have is ours to keep.
We’re stewards for a time.

4. It was not hard to double your money in that day.
Interest rates were up to 50% at that time.

5. But there is risk involved.
It’s a lot of money to be risking (as the third guy reminds us).

6. There is a day of reckoning where
God will want to know what we’ve done with what he’s entrusted to us and then we give it all back.

7. God gets the return, but those who invest get a huge reward –
they gain the rich master’s confidence and get huge responsibilities.

They’re set for life.

Encouraging in a day when banks are failing and investments are unsure.

Dick Shares his Story
We had a bunch of money from sale of house in Canada. Don’t own a house now to reinvest it. Lost money on exchange rate bringing it to US. Hard to get much interest on it now. So I’ve experienced a bit of the pain and uncertainty of this economy.

This Bible story gives us perspective. This story is talking about an investment strategy which pays well and is sure.

Bottom line: God has generously given us a lot
and he fully expects us to invest it in a way
that will give him a return.
And he’s coming to settle accounts.

Questions:
1. What do you think the talents represent?
Answer: left purposely vague. (more then just money)
Jesus wants us to apply it everywhere.

But if we think what else we know about Jesus and what he thought, a clear primary application emerges.

One way of seeing this is looking at Jesus’ own example.

2. What did the Father entrust Jesus with?

3. How did Jesus primarily invest that?

I want to suggest to you that the primary way Jesus wants us to invest what God has given us
is by investing in the lives of other people, to help them be better disciples of Jesus.

After all, those were Jesus parting words to us:

“All authority in heaven and earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations teaching them to obey everything I thought you and baptizing them in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit and lo I am with you even to the end of the age.”

Key take-away: I suspect one of the main things Jesus will be counting on judgment day will be how many disciples we’ve invested in.

I submit to you:

Jesus is not interested in counting
-The money in our bank accounts.
-The cars in our driveway.
-Not even the numbers who show up to our church.

As much as he’s counting.
The disciples we’ve invested in, by teaching them to follow him.

Practical Conclusions:
Some kinds of capital that we can invest in other people (in order of importance)?

1. Spiritual capital
2. Relational
3. Physical
4. Knowledge
5. Financial

Spiritual – our need to spend time with God to have something to share with others.
Relational – opening our hearts and lives / befriending.
Physical – (related) being there / just making time.
Knowledge – Sharing what we know.
Financial – actually sharing what we have. Generously investing in others, even with our money.
So, two questions to leave you with:

A.) What men has God put in your life whom you could be investing in? Maybe sons? Maybe other men?

B.)What training do you need to get going?
(Maybe you need someone to invest in you first so you’re one step ahead).

Implications for Men’s Ministry
Some guys who have a heard for leading this men’s ministry were talking the other night.

We felt one of the keys – is that the ministry is not just events.
It’s about discipling one another. In this sized group, but also smaller groups and one-on-one.

Men growing spiritually. Investing in one another.

Now, if you don’t know how to do that, and sense that you really need to know, and you’re willing to put in some time. One thing God has put on Terence and my heart, is to provide the training. Talk to us.

Exercise:
There are a number of barriers that can prevent us from disciplining.

TIME – I’m too busy to invest in others.
CAPITAL – I’m not sure what capital I have to share with others.
TRAINING – I don’t know how to invest in others.
PRIVACY – I don’t know who I can trust to get close to/open up to.
CONNECTIONS — I don’t know who I could invest in.
AWKWARD – It feels awkward to set myself up as someone who could disciple another person.

1.) Pick the barrier you believe is paramount in your life?
2.) Read passage again. How does it equip you to overcome this barrier?
3.) What’s one step I could take to lower this barrier?
4.) Pray for one another.

https://nymensministry.com/2009/01/31/14/

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God’s Response to Our Wounds

The Situation: We are all Wounded

  • We are all impacted by our parents. Their actions, their example and their love.
  • Since they are imperfect (like us), we are wounded.
  • These wounds leave us unsure about ourselves and afraid that we will be exposed as less then what we appear to be.
  • They are a lie, that says we are unworthy or not valuable.
  • Like any lie or half truth, it can cause us to respond incorrectly.
  • Even Jesus needed to hear words of affirmation from his father.

You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased  – Luke 3:22

God’s Response
Galatians 4:4-7
“But when the fullness of time had come. God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying “Abba! Father!” So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God.” (ESV)

Joshua 1:9
“…Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you where you go.”

Psalm 139:7-10
“Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.”

Proverbs 3:11-12
”My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline and do not resent his rebuke, because the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in” (NIV)

Hebrews 12:7
“Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?”

Proverbs 17:6
“The glory of children is their father” (NKJV)

Study Questions

  1. What words or thoughts strike you in the verses above?
  2. How has God affirmed you in a way your father didn’t or couldn’t?
  3. What implications does this have on us, as fathers?
  4. How can we pray for you as a father? For your son or daughter?